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tipping guidelines and why so much

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Joined: 11 May 2006
Posts: 6
Location: Burlington Canada

PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 9:26 pm    Post subject: tipping guidelines and why so much Reply with quote

Is anybody else out there tired of being expected to tip so d*mn much ??

It seems 15% is gone and 20% is expected all the time. I am tired of going to places that pay their staff sh*tty wages, all the while expecting me to pony up more on top of the 250% I pay for a bottle of wine already.

Case in point, my wife and I went to a place for apps and a beer, but instead we found a great plonk we used to have when we lived in Australia and ran out of. It cost $32.00 (retail about $14.00), and we split their huge "signature" appetizer, for a total of $45.00 all in. When the bottle was done, I got the bill marked $50.00 a the total and we went to leave.

As we neared the door, the manager asked if there was a problem with the service or the food. I told him everything was fine and asked HIM if there was a problem. He mentioned that the gratuity "seemed modest" and wanted to be sure our experience was "in keeping with their high standards". I told him that all was fine during our hour, but not any more. I told him I thought a $5.00 tip for a $10 appetizer was lots considering the bar tenders total effort was to punch in my order, and hand me a bottle and 2 glasses, as I poured for my wife and I and topped everything up.

He seemed annoyed that I wasn't prepared to cave and tip 20% on the wine and I suggested that if that wasn't sufficient, he should cancel my previous transaction and let me "re-assess" our overall experience. He chose not to, apologized for delaying us and turned away. Suffice to say, we have not been back since.

So, when you tip when you go out, how do you handle this ??
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Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Mon Sep 04, 2006 5:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh that's just awful.

I've never really been questioned about how I tipped before, especially by the manager of all people.

You handled it just perfectly, from the sounds of it. The tip sounds find for the service you received. If you had given a $20 tip, would you have been treated even better? (Doubt it since the tipping happens at the end of the meal and it seems like waitresses feel they're entitled a huge tip for mediocre service.)
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Joined: 12 May 2005
Posts: 33

PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2006 4:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Assuming good service, 20% for a meal. I will round to the nearest dollar for drinks ordered from the bar, or just throw a buck on the bar. Unless the bar bill is more than maybe $15, then maybe $2. Whatever seems right.

Although you might think that low wages for waitstaff is the fault of a restaurant owner, that is not the case. I don't know what it currently is, but minimum wage for waitstaff is considerable less than that for other workers. I am not sure of the reason, but I assume it is because of the relatively low margins that restaurants get. in many restaurants the waiter/waitress has to share their tips with the bussers and the bartenders and many times they have to pool tips (so the crappy waitresses get the same rate as the excellent ones - restaurant PC, I guess). Unless one works in a really high class restaurant, waiting tables is not a glamorous job. You have to present a good impression of the establishment regardless of who you service,which can be decent human beings, annoying dirtbags, clowns, perverts, arrogant SOB's, freaks, pigs, and who knows what else. Although the work is not back-breaking on the order of maybe laying bricks or erecting skyscrapers, it is long hours on your feet slogging heavy trays, and dealing with the aforementioned gaggle of miscreants whether on the dining room floor or in the kitchen.

All that being said, I think the maitre-d' you dealt with was slightly out of line. I think is was fine for him to ask if everything was ok, but to try to pinch you for more $$, no matter how well intentioned (or not) is going a bit too far.
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Joined: 08 Oct 2006
Posts: 42
Location: Massachusetts

PostPosted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 4:53 pm    Post subject: Tipping Reply with quote

Waitressing is generally a really taxing and crappy jog. It is the epitome of dealing with the public, and they don't have to be paid minimum wage. I almost always overtip, unless I have unusually bad service. I guess part of it is I'm so greatful I don't have to do that myself.
I figure if I can afford a $10 appetizer, I can afford to give the waitstaff a decent tip. I tend to tip more lavishly in humble restaurants.
That being said, the maitre'D trying to guilt you into shelling out some more cash is inexcusable. It sounds like maybe he was trying to blame the waitress, when obviously you had problems with the restaurant in general. I agree with you about the wine markup. I was in one well reputed restaurant, where they were selling Turning Leaf wine, retail maybe 10 bucks, for 40 bucks. WTF, its mediocre jug wine.
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Truck Driver

PostPosted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 3:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

My biggest problems with tipping are (1) the fact that what was once considered a gratuity has now come to be expected, and (2) an increasing number of restaraunts are adding the tip to the bill before giving it to you.

When I receive exceptional service, I try to tip accordigly. For a tip to be expected for average service has always seemed unreasonable to me. I would rather be charged more for the food and the wait staff paid more, than be told my meal will be one price and then be exepected to pay more for it...

As for those restaraunts that add the tip in 'for me,' If I'm made aware of that policy before ordering, I will leave. If, as has happened twice, it is done without forwarning, I will call the manager over and demand that it be removed. I'll then tip the waitstaff directly.

I'm in a service industry myself. I frequently work in people's homes. Sometimes they see fit to offer me a tip. I hope I never get to the point that I expect one.

Just my $.02

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Joined: 02 Nov 2005
Posts: 88
Location: WA

PostPosted: Tue Jan 16, 2007 1:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

i dunno....

i make it a policy (or maybe cuz i'm a cynical engineer) to never eat in a place that makes you "sniff" the cork on a bottle of wine, and/or charges me tip money to take a piss in the restroom cuz a nice old man, sitting next to my urinal, hands me a breath mint and a towel.

color me "snobbish". fine. Wink

whatever. as if.

my advice: "just say NO" to anyone who charges double digits for a 2.5 oz appetizer (even if its dipped in the finest of cheese!)


stick the fine fermented wine cork up the yin-yang!

go to establishments that offer good food, for great prices (or if you prefer, great food for good prices), and if the waitress has a nice "rack" and/or a sweet smile.... just give her a "fiver" next to your cup of coffee.... and count your blessings.... and walk away with no complaints.

(if an old lady rings you up at the cash stand [hint: i like the old fashioned diners], tell her to "have a nice day", and buy one of those 5 cent candy mints in the little bowl, and say "this is for you", as you walk out.... and "wink" and "smile" at her.)

why: cuz it's the "little" things people. baby steps. baby steps.

life is good.

nuff said. that's how simple it is. any more silly questions? Smile

anybody want any fries with that?

good.... carry on.
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Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 5
Location: Minneapolis area, Minnesota, USA

PostPosted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 5:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree, WTF with tipping rates

When I was young, the usual rate was 10%
Not too long ago it was 15%
These days its edging toward 20%

I'm not opposed to leaving a good tip for really good service but it seems that really good service is a rarity these days.

I'm inclined to tip a higher percentage for a lower cost meal. Does the wait staff have to work any harder to serve me a $25 steak than they do to serve a $10 burger? No.

And one last thing that bugs me about tipping: The tip jar on the counter at the coffee counter or the bagel shop.
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Joined: 26 Oct 2005
Posts: 535

PostPosted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Normally, I am a very good tipper, 20% at least of the total, including the tax. In a diner, especially if I am a regular, where the costs are lower, I might leave 33% especially if I am there for a longer time than the usual table turnover rate and service is very good. I also see a great discrepancy between the server in a diner who works a table for 90 minutes and gets 20% of a $30-40 check vs a server in a fancy restaurant who for the same time investment gets 20% of a $100-200 or more check.

However, a few weeks ago, we were out for a simple supper, I dropped my napkin and asked three different people for napkins over a 15 minute period. Finally, I got up and took one off another table that had just been re-set across the room. When they dropped off the check, I placed the exact amount in cash on the little plate the the check came on, and on the check I simply wrote, "no one ever brought me a napkin," and left. A tip should be deserved. If the servers think they should just get more money, they should complain to their employers for a better real salary. There is no reason why I should be directly paying their salaries. Nobody gives me a tip when I complete my work, and why is it that certain service vocations get tips and others don't?
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 2:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> I'm in a service industry myself. I frequently work in people's homes

i find myself wondering if you receive requests to barter sexual service in lieu of payment in cash.

In some cities on the East Coast, a taxi driver can find himself receiving these a few times a night.
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